Dandy Funk

Cooks to the galley!, one mentionable unmentionable I do recollect, though not over fondly, was 'dandy-funk', it was supposed to be a kind of duff, (steamed pudding type cake) served with everything and anything, the rather elderly cook in this case, reputed to have sailed as a deck hand during the first world war, Denis - needless to say known as the menace -, a kindly old Victorian alcoholic who was put on board sailing morning, straight to his bunk, and did not usually appear for at least twenty four hours, when the shakes took over for a week (with the help of a secreted bottle or two) until sailing for home when our illustrious chef de cuisine would start planning his pub crawl during the next all too brief couple of days period ashore. His culinary skills during the first couple of days were difficult to relate in comparison to the last few days of the voyage, boiled whole haddock - well, at least minus the head - for breakfast, mid-day and evening meal, there's allus plenty o' bread n' butter, corn flakes and tea, if I remembers to make it, for them wot grumble: as the voyage progressed the standard of cooking improved each meal, finishing up with table d' hot, cookie was not entirely averse to accepting a gratuity from those that enjoyed the better end of his cooking spectrum, a modest bung (backhander) of say a couple of pounds on pay day would always ensure an extra slice of this or helping of that. Not really happy days for such characters, but like it or not they did exist.